Day 22: The ups, downs and all-arounds...

Heidy Ho Everyone!

So, today has simply been all over the map.

To start with, it's WEIGH IN TIME!  I jumped on the scale this morning and was ecstatic to see that I am now at a weight of 349.9 lbs.  That means I've lost an even 17 lbs since starting this journey three weeks ago!!!!  *jumps for joy, then jiggles on the way back down*  My weight loss is sure to begin slowing down gradually - I've been through this enough to know to expect that, but I couldn't be happier to have such a fantastic starting point.

This means that I have already earned $110.00 for charity!  Over a hundred dollars in three weeks time!  Can you believe it?  When I started this, never in a million years would I have expected that kind of an outcome so very quickly, and I couldn't have done it without the support of Modina Arkills, Angelique Smith, Laurie Mahoney, Cheryl's Creative Block, Jenna Hodge and Richard Mahoney.  However, I still have till Saturday to get as much out of them as possible, so I really, really hope to pull off three more pounds before my end-of-month weigh in on Saturday, thus putting me at a solid 20 lb weight loss for the month.

Unfortunately, I am not off to a great start on that goal, but I'll get back to that in a minute.

So, my morning was spent in the hospital with my parents as my father was prepped for much needed knee replacement surgery.  Mom and I were extra responsible - each packing a bag full of nutritious, healthy goodies to get us through the day.  But, sadly, pre-op testing found that my father's blood sugar was elevated, which means that he may be pre-stage diabetic.  Since this new information puts him at risk, the doctor had to postpone the surgery until my father can follow up with his primary physician.  After having been in such pain and spending months looking forward to this surgery, my father was crushed and it absolutely broke my heart.  However, both aspects are a somber reminder of why I must lose this weight.  At 31 years old, my knees are already aching and I have a genetic disposition towards diabetes.

I'm confident I'm going to save myself this time around, and I'm incredibly hopeful that it is not too late for me to save my Dad, too.

After leaving the hospital, we went to a local diner for breakfast.  I did my best - asking if they had anything available with nutrition facts.  Unfortunately, it's just a small, family owned diner, so none of that information was available.  Therefore, I did my best to order sensibly, choosing a ham and cheese omelet with whole wheat toast.

Having not slept well last night due to allergies, stress and a terrible, hacking cough, I eagerly jumped back into bed the moment we got home.

I didn't fret much over lunch, since I had already packed food for the hospital, so I settled on a ham sandwich on whole wheat sandwich rounds, some carrots and two cheesesticks.

Shortly after, my painful cough got the very best of me, and I found myself doubled over in the bathroom, coughing so intensely that it felt as if I had razors rumbling around in my chest and losing my lunch.  Sadly, the only meds I had available was some out of date chloriseptic - but it numbed my throat enough to keep me from being sick again.

I had the great pleasure of joining my parents, aunts, uncles and grandmother at Outback Steakhouse for dinner.  Having been too tired to unpack my laptop (I took it to the hospital) and input my meals for the day, I was relatively confident that I had learned enough to make the right choices.  Plus, since my parents and I had eaten at Outback recently, my mom and I had already worked out the perfect way to split a meal and I had learned to skip the bread and my beloved Bloomin' Onion, so I was confident that all was good.

Besides - between coughing up a lung and laughing at my outrageous family, I was sure I was getting to burn SOME calories.  As a child, I had thought that my father's family was so proper and respectable.  After a couple of drinks, all of my child-like, preconcieved notions were demolished as my aunt shook her tatas in my grandmother's face, the elder folks discussed fiber, intestinal health, hormones and holistic healing, another aunt celebrated her birthday a week early just for the free ice cream and we took to calling everyone at the table "Bob".  For an added laugh, one couple - who claimed they only wanted a couple of drinks - ended up filling their bellies with everyone else's leftovers.

The great challenge of the night?  Aside from my parents and I, everyone else ordered dessert.  Not only that, but they all wanted to share, and the only way to share around the large table was to pass it around.

FOUR TIMES I held ice cream and chocolate and whip cream in my hands as I passed it back and forth.  I declined at least five very generous offers to take a bite.  I swore aside to my mom that if one more dish came into my hands, I was probably going to end up licking the damn thing clean.  Thankfully, the ice cream and chocolate had melted by then and the great-dessert-sharing of 2012 had come to an end.  In the process of laughing at my fool relatives' antics, my cough also seemed to ease up a little.  (Yes, Aunt Scary - I documented this for you, since I know how badly you were looking forward to reading all about it.  lol)

In addition to some wonderful laughter, I discussed ChuChi with my family for the first time and was - of course - ecstatic to see their pride and encouragement.  One of my aunts has already become incredibly supportive and is already discussing plans to challenge me for several months - possibly to benefit the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society, like I've been wanting so badly to do.  Even my grandmother sidled up to me at one point and asked me about it and, when I told her I've gone down a pant size...I'll never forget the gleam of pride in her eyes.  I hope I get to see that look many more times in the next couple of years.

We decided to gather at my aunt's house for a little while after dinner, with the exception that my parents and I had to run to the drug store to pick up some cough medicine.  This was when this roller coaster of a day took a turn for the worse.

You know that moment when you see something in the street, and you try to figure out whether it is an object or a living thing?  My father was pulling up in front of Publix as we found ourselves facing that moment - except the answer was immediately clear upon the people stopping and staring motionlessly at the small kitten in the middle of the road.  My father had not even come to a complete stop yet when my mom and I both jumped out of the car and ran towards the small thing, it's tail wagging sporatically.  At first, I was hopeful - but as I got closer, I could tell that there was no way this beautiful, tiny little cat was going to survive this.  "They just hit it."  One of the bystanders told us as I bent down and my mom hovered over me.  She had a severe head injury and one of her paws was damaged.  "Another cat chased her out into the street."  The woman beside him informed us.

How can someone hit a living creature and just drive off?  How can people witness it happen and just stand there and watch as this beautiful, tiny little thing suffers?  I can't wrap my head around the fact that there is anyone out there who wouldn't do exactly as my mother and I had done - run to the animal's aid as quickly as possible.  As I looked around for something to help me pick up the kitten (I didn't want to get blood on my hands or my clothes), the frail thing began seizing terribly.  My mom wanted to do something, but I knew it was too late - the only thing we could possibly do was end this as quickly as possible.  Sadly, I didn't have the first clue how to do that humanely in the middle of the street.

By then, my father had put the car in park, turned on the emergency lights, closed the door and reached our side.  Having worked for a veterinarian as a teenager, he is much more familiar with these kinds of things.  He reached down, his hand nearly dwarfing the kitten, placing his thumb over the kitten's heart.  I've seen animals and people die before and...I am able to go a little numb in the moment...rationale overriding emotion.  But I'm sitting here now, remembering what the poor little thing looked like and it's breaking my heart.  It didn't take much, but my father was able to put enough pressure on her heart to end her suffering more swiftly.  I went inside Publix and grabbed some bags, came back out and scooped her up.

One person suggested that we simply throw her in the garbage and, I guess in the grand scheme of things, there is nothing inhumane about that.  But any time my family has witnessed an animal's passing, we've seen to it that it recieve a burial.  So, when we got home, I took the little kitten to a dirt area outside of our home and buried her as deeply as I was able to before my cough took over.

See what I mean?  Pretty crazy, warped day, wasn't it?

Finally, before starting this post, I updated my food journal for the day and sadly discovered that I came in *just* under my suggested caloric intake for the day and went way over my suggested fat and protein intakes for the day.  Granted, since the diner this morning is not online, my breakfast entries are all rough estimates (and I tend to round up).  In addition, there is no calculating what I might have lost when I was sick earlier, so it's all kind of up in the air for the day.  No worries:  live, learn and do better tomorrow.

Meanwhile, due to my weight loss thus far, I have now recalculated my daily goals and have found that - although significant - the recommended changes are doable.

Between the cough, the robitussin, the stress, the joy, the sorrow and everything else - it is easy to understand why I am so very ready to climb into my bed right now.  So, goodnight my friends and - as always - thanks for following along.

Love and Squishes,
ChuChi

PS:  I finally learned how to change my settings so you no longer have to sign up for a google account in order to comment on my posts!  I hope that this will encourage more of you to comment more frequently, as I love recieving feedback - but if you are not a google user, please sign your comments with a name or nickname so that I know who I'm talking to.  HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU SOON!